Renowned author speaks at Resiliency Day on Grand Forks AFB Published Aug. 16, 2012 By Staff Sgt. David Dobrydney 319th Air Base Wing Public Affairs GRAND FORKS AIR FORCE BASE, N.D. -- The 319th Air Base Wing hosted a unique visitor August 15. Dr. Robert Wicks, a psychologist and author of more than 40 books on mental health, spoke to Airmen during the Wing's Resiliency Day. Col. Tim Bush, 319th ABW commander, noted during introductory remarks that the Air Force has experienced 39 suicides in 2012. "This Air Force needs each one of you," Bush said, adding that resiliency isn't built by interacting via e-mail. "It happens when we get face to face with each other and reach out and help someone." Before turning the floor over to Wicks, Bush added, "It's not just about writing an EPR or a training report. It's about taking care of our Airmen." As a former Marine, Wicks recognizes the unique situation servicemembers are in. "I think resilience has more of an immediate impact on military audiences," he said. "There is a certain type of stress you experience in the military, even when you're not in a hot zone, that is not present in civilian life." During his speech, Wicks spoke on a range of topics, but one subject he kept returning to was the importance of perspective. "If we lose a healthy perspective, we're lost," he said. In order to build a healthy perspective, Wicks gave many pieces of advice, including some seemingly contradictory words about expecting nothing in return when a person has found their gift to the world. "It's about giving that gift freely ... pushing that gift to the edge, then finding other Airmen who can support, challenge and inspire so that it's not just your gift, it's your gift as a team," he said. Wicks also counseled the audience not to let themselves be dragged down by unhappy people. "There are people who have experienced things in their life that they cover with anger, sarcasm or jadedness," he said. "I don't think we should pick on those people because they've gone through difficult times," he continued, citing a principle of "low expectations, high hopes." "You accept them for where they're at, but you behave as if they can be more." Wicks told the audience that maintaining respect and a healthy perspective is not easy and told them that hardship and adversity will come sooner or later. When it does, he said, it doesn't matter how much darkness enters their lives, but how they stand in it that matters. "When one is suffering, one must always remember the important reality of hope," Wicks said. "Hope isn't simply believing when things are going well; hope is an attitude of living which makes one seek and find new possibilities." Wicks' speech, sprinkled throughout with jokes and anecdotes from his travels around the world, impressed the audience. "He had really good advice," said Senior Airman Crystal Dail, 319th Communications Squadron. "His views on 'sharing your joy,' I never thought about it that way." As his speech came to a close, Wicks said the ideas he shared with the 319th Air Base Wing won't stop any darkness or despair that might come over them someday. However, if they approach that darkness with a sense of mindfulness and perspective and find humility, they might come out the better for it. "Because when we take humility and add it to knowledge you get wisdom," he said, "and when we take that wisdom and add it to compassion we get love." Wicks finished by saying he was honored to be with the Airmen of Grand Forks Air Force Base, and left one last word of advice. "Please just do three simple things: do what you can for others, see something greater than yourself and pay attention to it, and please, take care of yourself."